The Veras FC

Angus Deayton isn’t a man unfamiliar with the sting of ignominy, but he suffered probably his greatest public humiliation this weekend, as his Submarine side were torn apart by a rampant Veras team 10 – 2 in the Quarter Final of the Divisional Musical Associations Cup.

Submarine had the hilarious temerity to even go ahead early on, before a quick-fire Oli Jones hat-trick turned the tables. Submarine got a goal back from a well-worked freekick, and threatened to draw level, with only the goal keeping heroics of Tarn Willers and some last ditch defending keeping them out.

But Veras were in no mood to fanny about: A beautifully flighted Andre Lazos corner found Barney Thomas at the front stick who buried his header, before the two linked up again for a mirror image goal from the other corner, putting the Veras 5 – 2 up at halftime.

The Veras’ pressure was unremitting in the second half, as Submarine utterly capitulated under an onslaught of Veras’ attacks. Not so much shooting fish in a barrel as shooting lemmings as they jump off a cliff: if you miss, they’re still going to die. Tenuous metaphors aside, the Veras were irresistible in the second half with Thomas rounding off his man of the match performance by completing his hat-trick; Jones netted two more to take his tally to 14 goals in his last five games, while Tommy Fyans and Dave Romain completed the bludgeoning with a goal apiece.

Veras started the match strongly, before a well struck Submarine shot on the edge of the Veras’ box found the bottom corner.

Lazos picked up the first of his half-a-dozen assists for the day 5 minutes later, sliding in Jones who left the keeper with no chance hitting a crisp drive into the bottom right hand corner.

And Veras were ahead two minutes later as Johnny Erdman, playing in the hole, slipped a through ball to Jones who dummied the keeper, before firing home from an acute angle into an empty net.

Jones completed his hat-trick five minutes later, after some sumptuous interplay in midfield culminated with a rasping drive from Erdman which the Submarine keeper could only parry into the path of an on-rushing Jones to tap home.

Submarine then had their best spell of the game putting the stout Veras defence under pressure for the first time in the match. A shocking decision from the referee gave Submarine a freekick on the edge of the area, for what was quite clearly a superb challenge.

Willers did superbly to palm the resulting freekick onto the post, only for it to drop to a Submarine forward to dispatch the rebound.

Willers was there again to save from a goal mouth scramble two minutes later, before Duncan Meadows cleared off the line from the follow up.

The Veras were in devastating form going forward with Al Fitch providing the anchor in midfield, while Thomas pulled the strings, playing in Romain and Lazos on the wings who looked dangerous every time they got the ball.

The Veras took control of the game as the half wore on, Romain created a great chance for Jones to get his forth, only for the keeper to save with his face from close range.

From the resulting corner, Lazos fired a ball to the front stick to Thomas, who, stepping away from his man, sailed through the air to meet the ball with a bullet header which found the top corner.

Two minutes later Lazos and Thomas repeated their routine from the opposite corner with a carbon copy cross and header ending with the same result, leaving the Veras three goals to the good at halftime.

The second half started where the first left-off (as is traditional). The Veras’ football was utterly irresistible, as the midfield scythed through Submarine at will, while a rock solid back four disassembled any semblance of a Submarine attack.

The Veras’ fearsome centre-back Tommies: Derbyshire and Fyans, who have forged a classic partnership this season, were winning everything in the air, while the outlet play of fullbacks Meadows, Dan Swimer and Darren Whitehead opened up space all over the pitch for the Veras’ attacks.

It was only a matter of time before the Veras extended their lead. With Lazos once again the catalyst, picking up yet another assist, whipping in a corner which found Fyans who dispatched a venomous volley from eight yards out.

Three minutes later, Duncan played in Jones on the right wing who crossed to Thomas, who did superbly to control the ball from behind him, swivel and dispatch a drive into the bottom corner.

Thomas returned the favour playing in Jones for his fourth goal two minutes later, floating a lobbed through ball which Jones dispatched on the rise.

Dave Romain, in scintillating form on the wing, whipped in a cross for the Vera’s ninth goal five minutes later, as Erdman nodded down for Jones who was left with a simple finish to net his fifth.

Jones was in again two minutes later, latching on to a perfectly weighted through ball from Fitch; a last ditch Submarine tackle served only to leave it on a plate for Romain who rifled home a thoroughly deserved goal to bring up the double figures.

The Veras display is sure to have fellow quarter finalists quaking in their boots, especially considering Submarine have beaten a number of the league’s top teams left in the draw.

A glorious day that will live long in the memory of Veras new and old.

Erdman for England manager? It’s certainly alliterative enough.

A thoroughly unfamiliar Veras side brushed aside an under-strength Submarine 11 at Regents Park last Sunday.

Two debut goals from the Veras’ fearsome left wing partnership — full back Christopher and winger Alex — and a penalty rebound from Oli settled a match that never seemed far from the Veras’ control.

Submarine will have been buoyed before the match by the absence of half-a-dozen first team regulars, sourcing diamonds in Antwerp and molesting gap year students in Argentina respectively, the Veras starting side was hardly recognisable.

But Submarines’ hope was short-lived as it became apparent early-on that despite not having played together before the Veras shared an innate understanding that saw them dominate the first half.

The midfield three of Tom, Eddie and Dave bossed the match as they spread the ball well to the pacey Veras wings, as both Alex and Andre found early success on their flanks.

And despite a variety of chances it took till the 40th minute for the Veras to make the breakthrough they so richly deserved.

Jones’ monster throws had been wreaking havoc in the Submarine defensive ranks all afternoon and it was from a long throw that a goal mouth scramble saw the ball break to Veras’ left winger Alex who dispatched his chance with clinical low drive.

The Veras started brightly in the second half as Oli was put through time and again by Andre, Tom and Alex, but failed to capitalise on his opportunities.

But it was from a corner that Jones forced Submarine to concede, that a superb delivery from Andre found Christopher at the back post who dispatched a venomous volley back across the keeper and into the bottom corner.

Submarine were dealt a farcical life-line when the ball bounced up and hit Veras right back on the hand and a penalty was awarded.

Someone scored and it lead to a brief period of Submarine pressure during which time Ben was called upon to make a string of solid saves.

Mike and Edu quickly regained control of their territory and the pressure was short-lived as the Veras were awarded their own hand-ball pen.

Dave Romain stepped up and with more than a whiff of Cruyff’s famous pass-pen he stroked the ball cunningly against the post sending the keeper the wrong way and giving the on-rushing Oli an empty net to slot into.

The Veras were denied a clear cut pen when Andre flicked a shot goal ward only to have it groped away from the goal, but despite the sheepish defender’s scant denials the ref refused to award the peg.

Verasmash

The Veras’ roller-coaster start to the season continued this Sunday as they bounced back from a 3-1 defeat last week with a consummate demolition of the Longwall Lions at Market Road.

Oli Jones opened the scoring with an improved toe poke and Rob Yates doubled the Vera’s lead as half-time approached after some sustained pressure. Longwall pulled one back with a looping effort from range bang on the halftime whistle. Only for The Veras to restore the gap after the break with a header from Dan Slyvester from a set play before debutant Carl Peters volleyed home a deserved fourth.

Longwall pulled one back before a Johnny Erdman brace either side of a Longwall consolation put the game to bed.

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